When I really started to dig in and reflect on what was happening I began to wonder why I ever even started. I would look at "friends" and their picture perfect world, because that is what it is. You don't post about the day to day hardships of life, marriage, motherhood. You don't post "real" pictures of your life. You post the good, happy times, because that is what everyone wants to see. You start to feel like you need to "keep up with the Jones" or at least that is honestly what I started to feel. I questioned why we weren't taking more family vacations or date nights together. I needed a big wake up call. I stopped cold turkey, completely deleted my account, no temporary leave of Facebook, yep, I got rid of it forever. At first it felt weird to not grab my phone, scroll through the pages but it quickly became easier to fill my nights with card games, playing basketball, coloring or simply holding my boys in my arms and reading a good book. I didn't realize how much my kids were being affected by me being on my phone. I wasn't on it constantly. I would put it away for most of the night but I would catch myself checking it here and there and that is what my boys were seeing. My husband was easily annoyed each time I was on it and a sense of resentment was soon taking over our marriage. It bothered him more than I knew and it was slowly breaking us apart. It was time to make a change!
My days of taking a picture and instantly posting it are over!!! I still enjoy the big game, play dates, fun adventures, date nights, little family vacations and although I continue to take lots of pictures, those are now only for me and my family.
