Ahhh...School lunches....

My husband laughs at me 99.9% of the time when my type A personality shines through!!  I am pretty crazy about pre-planning dinners on Saturday night and I head to the grocery store bright and early Sunday morning so I can prep food for the week ahead. Recently, I had a brilliant idea to buy some cheap (79 cents each to be exact) baskets to help organize our pantry and refrigerator for lunches. I have 2 different baskets in the pantry and 3 in the fridge.  I pre-prep food every Sunday and baggie up goodies for the boys to choose from. I mainly pick 2 from each of the categories below and rotate each grocery trip so the foods selected allow the boys to have a variety of lunch options.  I don't pre-make the main course but the planning of fruits, veggies, protein, snacks and treats come in pretty handy.  Below are a list of items that I buy, cut up, baggie up and the boys simply pick and place in their lunch.  The best part is that I only have to make the main course the night before, let's be honest mainly sandwiches and throw in a juice box and it takes less time each night to make lunches and the boys get a kick in helping "pack" their own lunch for the next day. The list below are some ideas and like I said I don't give them every option.  For example last week I pre cut and baggied up cucumber and carrots in one basket, hard boiled eggs and string cheese in another, you get the idea......

Veggies (boys pick one)
cucumbers
baby carrots
celery w a small pack of peanut butter
bell peppers
pickles
snap peas
cherry tomatoes
broccoli
jicama sticks
*hummus snack packs are one of my boys favorites to dip with their veggies

Fruit (boys pick one)
strawberries
blueberries
raspberries
applesauce
grapes
watermelon
apple slices
Fruit cup (if fresh isn't available):
peaches
pears
mandarin oranges
pineapple



Protein (boys pick one)
hard boiled eggs (my kindergartner LOVES these)
string cheese
edamame
yogurt
elk jerky (we make our own)
pumpkin seeds
almonds or nuts

Snacks (boys pick two) one for lunch and one for their snack: 
cheeze-its
pretzels
kid cliff zone bars
yogurt covered raisins
dried cranberries
organic fruit leather or snacks
goldfish
ritz crackers
granola bars
popcorn
jello cups
pudding cups

Treats (Sometimes I skip this one, oh I lie...actually this only happens sporadically): 
cookie
brownie bites
small piece of candy
rice krispy treat
small donut hole

ENJOY packing lunches for the next 180 plus days.... :)

Raising my boys to be gentleman....

17 years ago I became a mom for the first time.  10 years later I became a mom again, and a year later our 3rd little baby boy was born.  Being a mom of 3 boys is one of my greatest blessings.  My motherhood journey started when I was 21 years old.  I had little experience with life at that point but knew one thing, no matter what I was going to raise my son to be a true gentleman. I pride myself in teaching my boys to be respectful, responsible, kind and confident young men.  Especially when they are dealing with the opposite sex. My boys know that when the garage door opens and mom is coming in from the grocery store they come out to help carry in the groceries, hold the door open or help put away what they can.  I love seeing my boys hold open doors for others and lend a hand when needed.  The other day I was brought to tears when my mom text me a picture of some beautiful flowers that my oldest son brought to her.  He stayed and talked with her about her day and made her laugh and smile a little brighter.  He is sensitive and has the kindest heart of any kiddo I know.  Now that he is 17 he has started dating.  He has been dating the same girl for the last 8 months and we have had our fair share of teenage battles with dating but the one thing that I have stayed strong on is him treating his girlfriend with respect.  When she was recently sick he brought her a sweet card and her favorite flowers.  He has surprised her before school with her favorite coffee or left notes on her car.  He has seen that the little things mean the most and don't go unnoticed.  So you can imagine my concern when I started reading some of the text messages between the two, the way she talked to him when I was around (which I quickly brought to his attention when she was gone) and the emotional roller coaster of break-ups that she initiates and the comments about how he doesn't do "enough" for her made my blood boil.  Parker and I have a very open relationship and he comes and talks to me about many different things going on in his life.  I couldn't help but remind him that although he needs to always be a gentleman he DOES not deserve to be a doormat to someone.  We talked about how you teach someone how to treat you and if he was to continue to allow her to text and talk to him the way that she does then it will only continue without any change on her part.  I thought that him simply seeing the example that his step father and I have set would be enough for him to follow but I realized that he needed to hear it from me too.  It kills me to see him hurt and upset over someone who manipulates and takes advantage of a good hearted boy who was raised right. Thankfully, he does know his worth in a relationship and will stand up for himself.  I just hope that there are moms out there raising their daughters to respect, love and treat the good guys the way that they also deserve to be treated.  I won't stop teaching my boys the value of being a true gentleman and only pray that they will find the right heart that will do the same daily for them.

Full Circle...

20 years ago I walked the campus of Eastern Washington University for the first time. I will never forget the feeling of excitement as I moved into my tiny dorm room. It's hard to believe that 20 years later I am walking the same campus with my oldest son, a junior in high school who is also a running start freshman at EWU this fall.  He had his first orientation to campus life on Wednesday and there was no way I was going to miss that moment with him.  The campus looked the same and my mind was flooded with all of the wonderful memories from my freshman and sophomore year when I lived in Cheney.  There were also several times during the orientation that I had tears in my eyes, not tears of sadness but tears of joy.  Looking at my baby boy, who is now more of a man, I can't help but be proud of the person that he has become.

It was Christmas break my junior year at EWU when I found out I was pregnant.  My carefree college life changed from that moment on. I was 21 in a little apartment where I was busy changing diapers, midnight feedings, working full time and attending school part time while my friends were enjoying the bar and dancing the night away. But honestly, I wouldn't change any of it.  I look at it like this, I was able to be a mom sooner, which has allowed me to love my son longer.  To get to where we are now wasn't easy but so worth it. Parker was three when I finally graduated college with my BAE in elementary education.  One of my favorite pictures is of me, my mom and Parker at my graduation ceremony.  He wore my graduation cap on his little head with a crooked grin that showed exactly how incredibly proud of his mommy he was.  Parker was also right by my side when I graduated from Gonzaga with my masters in literacy.  Without doubt Parker has been one of the reasons why I continue to have the drive and motivation in life that I do. Everyday he shows me true GRIT, passion and perseverance in life.  As he embarks on this next chapter in his life I know that he will continue to amaze me with his positive, never give up drive!

Treatment begins...

Yesterday my beautiful momma was moved from the 9th floor at Sacred Heart to the 7th floor, the oncology unit.  It's one thing to be in the hospital and the feeling of sadness as you walk through the halls but a whole different feeling when you walk down the halls of patients who are ALL fighting cancer. The one thing I wasn't expecting to see was all the smiles, from nurses to patients (who were walking around with their chemotherapy IV drips) and family members supporting their loved ones.  It's simply amazing what a smile can do to lift your spirits.   My dad who has hardly left my mom's side needed a break and was happy to see me walk through the door of her hospital room.  He left to go home and would return later that night.

My mom started her first round of chemotherapy last night.  She had her port put in earlier that day and at 6:15pm we started the five and a half hour journey of giving her 3 different kinds of chemotherapy to fight this horrific disease. They gave her some saline first, then some nausea medicine, benadryl for any allergic reaction and then after 15 minutes came back to start her first of many IV drips of chemotherapy. The benadryl made her sleepy so she began resting when they first began.  I was alone in the room with her and watched as the IV drip slowly worked its way into the tube and through her port.  They gave her the highest dose you can, 3 weeks worth of chemotherapy at once.  As I sat looking at my mom I couldn't help but fight back tears because I knew in that moment that this was the start of a hard battle.  But as I looked at her a little more I was reminded that she is a fighter, the strongest, most optimistic, uplifting, selfless person I know.

After she woke up from her one hour nap, she looked at me and smiled.  She sat up in her bed and wanted to eat some dinner.  We talked, laughed and watched a little TV together. It's amazing how quickly 5 and a half hours can go when you are surrounded by people you love. A little after the last drip of chemotherapy was given, I kissed her forehead as she was peacefully sleeping and left.  As I walked to my car at 2am I thought about how blessed I have been to have my mother in my life.  I hope that one day I can be half the mother that she has been to me.

Our journey may have just started with her treatment and there will be some hard days ahead but I know that through this we will all become a little stronger, closer and appreciate life that much more.

One Word...

While sitting by my mom's bedside at the hospital over the past week I have been waiting for my "one word" to come to me as I venture into my 2nd year as Assistant Principal.  This is an activity that our Superintedent has us participate in each year.  The word that you choose should be one that you can connect with in your work life and your personal life. There have been several words that have crossed my mind as I have watched my mom battle this horrific disease of cancer.  Cancer has left her sick, weak, in excruciating pain and fighting for her life.  I find myself holding it together when I am with my mom because I don't want her to worry about me.  Which shows my strength but then when I am alone or with my husband I simply fall apart, cry and feel nothing but weakness.  The word strength just didn't seem fitting. Neither did the words, breathe, inspire, fight, live, love, heart or faith.  I was having a hard time finding the "one word" that would fit my personal journey right now and my work path until I kept coming across "one word" that stuck out to me.  The word, my one word for next year is moment. As I thought about this word I realized it was perfect. There have been moments in my career that have changed me, who I am, how I teach and the students that I connect with.  Moments where I was so happy to see a child succeed and moments of hurt and frustration when I wondered if I was truly doing enough to reach each student.  There have been moments in my career that have defined who I am as a leader and moments that I have learned from.  Moments in my personal life that have also changed me.  After losing our son in those moments I held onto my family. That moment changed me as a person, wife and mother.  Even though that moment was one of the hardest things I have endured that moment made be better.  Sometimes the moments of struggle, heartache and pain are the moments that make us who we are.  My focus for this year is going to be to live in the moment, each and every day.  To take the moments and cherish them for what they are. 

My "one word"  is truly more than fitting when you really take a good look at it...MOMent! 

The Waiting Game...

I've had this feeling before.  The knot in my stomach, lump in my throat, feeling of panic and complete numbness. This time it came from a phone call from my dad and a panicked rush up to my parents house.  I walked in and my mom grabbed a hold of me, we hugged, started crying and I knew in that instant it was bad.  My mom, a two time breast cancer survivor has been in and out of doctors lately.  She has been diagnosed with a cough (that just needed to run its course) to IBS (so she changed up her diet) but it was Monday, July 25th when our entire lives changed.  That morning her breathing became more labored and her stomach became so enlarged she looked 6 months pregnant.  My dad took her into the urgent care and he refused to leave with her until they performed some actual tests and did a scan of her stomach.   In that moment I was thankful for my dad's stubborn ways.  My mom had fluid in her abdomen and around both of her lungs.  Then the word that I dreaded hearing, cancer.  From mastastesized lesions on her liver to masses in her stomach and ovaries.  To what extent is unknown until we meet with the oncologist and we get some results back.

Yesterday, I met my parents at 7am at the hospital so my mom could have a paracentesis (removal of fluid in the abdomen) and a thoracentesis (removal of fluid around her lungs). Thankfully, I was able to stay in the room with her for both of these procedures.  Not really knowing what I was getting into or how I would handle watching the needles I simply had to remain strong because it was extremely painful for her.  She started breathing better but wasn't feeling very well after the procedure.  Her vitals continually dropped and they were looking at sending her to the ER and admitting her overnight.  With some oxygen and rest her vitals came back up, she was able to eat and looked a little more like her spunky sweet self.  She was sent home from the hospital last night and now it's calls to Cancer Care Northwest today, scheduling appointments and waiting.  Waiting to see what is next.  I know one thing, my mom is the strongest woman I know and a fighter!

Things we learned in marriage counseling....

Today marks nine years since I slipped into my white wedding dress and walked down the aisle to find the man of my dreams waiting to whisk me away to happily ever after.  Nine years later and tonight we aren't celebrating with a fancy dinner instead we are heading to the ball park to watch our two youngest boys play baseball and that is exactly where I want us to be.   We have had many great years together and we have had some not so great years together.  The struggle of marriage is real.  We have been jealous of one another, fought about money, how to parent our boys but in the end we are a team who supports each other through this journey of marriage.  We started going to a marriage counselor about six months ago, something we should have done 7 years ago after we lost our son, Brody.  I wish we would have gone and talked about my guilt, the pain and how we move forward together.  I believe that if we would have tried counseling then some of the mistakes and pain that I caused in our marriage wouldn't have happened.  But, you can't live in the past with regret! All you can do is move forward and that is where we are now.  We have both learned so much about ourselves and each other through marriage counseling. There are many things that we have discovered in our marriage counseling sessions that have helped.  For us, communication is HUGE!  I've heard it a million times before but the truth is many times in our marriage we stopped communicating with each other.  There are several reasons why, from kids to jobs to you simply stop saying the same thing over and over to your spouse because you sound like a broken record! With communication you have to express your needs and not get defensive when you hear something you disagree about.  I found out through counseling that I do this and it shuts my husband down and he doesn't talk...he's a very quiet person as it is so this is key for me to remember when he is telling me his needs or talking to me about something that is bothering him. During counseling one of our homework assignments was to find each other's love language.  I thought for sure I knew my husbands without him even taking the quiz.  For years I was intentionally meeting his needs or so I thought! Imagine my surprise when I found out he was a physical touch guy and not an acts of service guy.  Of course when I heard this I rolled my eyes because I thought most guys must be physical touch. That just means having sex but then my hubby explained it to me.  He told me that he loves when we are driving in the car and I grab his hand to hold.  When we are sitting next to one another and I put my hand on his leg.  When I walk up to him and just wrap my arms around him and give him a hug.  I know my husband feels closest to me when we are having sex but it's those simple things that make him feel the most loved. So, I make it a priority to do those things more.  My husband learned that I am a quality time gal and that just simple spending some one on one time with me is all that I need.  I don't need fancy dinners, vacations or expensive gifts.  I just simply like that time together. One thing my hubby and I started to do at night is go on walks.  We have discovered some cool hiking trails right up the hill from our house.  Many nights you can find us taking a hike to sit on the rocks at the top of the mountain and watch the sun set.  Sometimes the boys come with us and other times they stay at home with our oldest.  It's those times that mean so much to me.  For us communicating our needs and listening to one another has improved our marriage, all things we wouldn't have known if we hadn't gone to counseling. Although there have been some bumps in the road and times where we felt like we lost it all, in the end we still had one another and a marriage worth saving.  Marriage takes work, honesty, trust, forgiveness, and love.  All things that I hope we have shown our children over the last nine years and will continue to show them for many, many more!